How Not to Kill Yourself

A brief step away from the topic of war, in response to the train wreck in California that killed 11 people.

I am opposed to suicide for many reasons, which I will not take the time to discuss here. Let me make that very clear. PEOPLE SHOULD NOT KILL THEMSELVES.

If, however, some people are determined to end their own lives, can't they please manage to do so in a way that doesn't take other people with them? Because this man in California was "despondent," he parked his SUV on the train tracks, setting off a wreck that involved three trains and killed 11 people who were not despondent and had no wish to die. And to top it off, he had second thoughts and jumped out of his SUV at the last minute, so he's still alive!

I realize that people who decide to commit suicide are not thinking rationally, but this kind of behavior drives me nuts. Thinking of killing yourself? Don't run the car with the garage door closed--you'll poison your whole family. Don't stand in front of a semi--the driver does not need to live with the memory of your last moment of life in front of his truck. And don't park on train tracks! This man thinks he was despondent before? Wonder how he feels now that he's responsible for 11 deaths.

I'll end this with a poem from the inimitable Dorothy Parker, written in 1926:

Résumé

Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.